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Door: Melanie
Blijf op de hoogte en volg Melanie
16 April 2012 | Italië, Cesena
In life, I have always had difficulties with being criticized. I always felt completely stupid after someone had given me negative feedback about anything in any kind of way. I have always been scared of receiving any kind of feedback.
Here in Italy, the professors have a different way of telling me that there was something that I did not do right. This does not only make me feel less stupid, it actually makes me feel excited about the criticism they give me. I am happy to get another insight in something that I worked on by myself. In my first month at the University of Bologna I have had positive interactions with both my professor and the supervisor of my master thesis. For a long time, I have always had the idea that teachers only want to bring you down. Here, I realize that they are only here to help you, guide you, and to support you.
However, you are still reading a psychologist’s blog here. Not just any psychologist, but one that is doing her master research at the moment. So she will not state that it is simply a difference of teachers between countries that causes this. Because I definitely do not want to say that my previous professors were not good in giving feedback. There are many other factors that should be taken into account here. The most important one is that I am older, more serious, and more developed than I was in—for example—high school. Seven years ago I did not care that much about learning everything that the teachers told me. Now, I am studying something that I actually chose to study and therefore I am very interested in everything that is being taught. Furthermore, I am getting more and more excited to graduate and to start working as an organizational psychologist.
Whatever the reasons are, I am very happy with the academical contacts I am having here in Italy. I used to get completely de-motivated by any criticism (I always gave up as soon as someone said that I did something wrong) but now I am getting completely motivated to improve the things that I am doing.
Other contacts I am happy about are the ones with a new group of international students. I am mostly hanging out with the girls of my master, who are coming from countries like Colombia, the Philippines, Romania, Ukraine, and France of course. Furthermore I am very lucky to have another great roommate (like I had in the U.S.A.): Nayara comes from Brazil. Thus I am having another multi-cultural experience while being abroad. It is always good to have international people around you because you all share the same experience. Those people understand you, and have the same (temporary) life-style as you. Together we are making this semester unforgettable.
And of course there still remain my contacts at distance. This time it is not only with my family and friends but also with Philippe. I have to say that it is not easy to be back at our long distance relationship. But I am very lucky to see him about every three weeks. For the people who are keeping count: that means that I saw him for a second time since my last blog. He came to Italy again but this time we met in the romantic city of Venice. We thought that our love-story was not cliché enough yet ;).
Like Florence, I had high expectations because of the stories that people told me about this city. Like Florence, the city was full of tourists, especially since we were there for the Easter weekend. However, unlike Florence, I totally loved this city! Maybe because of the canals. Or maybe because I was there with Philippe. Anyway, I had a great weekend and I recommend this pretty city to anyone who is looking for a good place to visit.
Contacts I am less happy about, are the ones with ‘my readers’ :P. I noticed that there are way more people reading this than I am aware of. Since you probably like to read it (otherwise you would not do it) you might understand that I like to read something of you too. Moreover, you know now, that I like to receive feedback; even when it is negative. Okay but seriously, I will not force anyone because it has to stay natural, but I do appreciate any kind of reaction on my blog :).
Here in Italy, the professors have a different way of telling me that there was something that I did not do right. This does not only make me feel less stupid, it actually makes me feel excited about the criticism they give me. I am happy to get another insight in something that I worked on by myself. In my first month at the University of Bologna I have had positive interactions with both my professor and the supervisor of my master thesis. For a long time, I have always had the idea that teachers only want to bring you down. Here, I realize that they are only here to help you, guide you, and to support you.
However, you are still reading a psychologist’s blog here. Not just any psychologist, but one that is doing her master research at the moment. So she will not state that it is simply a difference of teachers between countries that causes this. Because I definitely do not want to say that my previous professors were not good in giving feedback. There are many other factors that should be taken into account here. The most important one is that I am older, more serious, and more developed than I was in—for example—high school. Seven years ago I did not care that much about learning everything that the teachers told me. Now, I am studying something that I actually chose to study and therefore I am very interested in everything that is being taught. Furthermore, I am getting more and more excited to graduate and to start working as an organizational psychologist.
Whatever the reasons are, I am very happy with the academical contacts I am having here in Italy. I used to get completely de-motivated by any criticism (I always gave up as soon as someone said that I did something wrong) but now I am getting completely motivated to improve the things that I am doing.
Other contacts I am happy about are the ones with a new group of international students. I am mostly hanging out with the girls of my master, who are coming from countries like Colombia, the Philippines, Romania, Ukraine, and France of course. Furthermore I am very lucky to have another great roommate (like I had in the U.S.A.): Nayara comes from Brazil. Thus I am having another multi-cultural experience while being abroad. It is always good to have international people around you because you all share the same experience. Those people understand you, and have the same (temporary) life-style as you. Together we are making this semester unforgettable.
And of course there still remain my contacts at distance. This time it is not only with my family and friends but also with Philippe. I have to say that it is not easy to be back at our long distance relationship. But I am very lucky to see him about every three weeks. For the people who are keeping count: that means that I saw him for a second time since my last blog. He came to Italy again but this time we met in the romantic city of Venice. We thought that our love-story was not cliché enough yet ;).
Like Florence, I had high expectations because of the stories that people told me about this city. Like Florence, the city was full of tourists, especially since we were there for the Easter weekend. However, unlike Florence, I totally loved this city! Maybe because of the canals. Or maybe because I was there with Philippe. Anyway, I had a great weekend and I recommend this pretty city to anyone who is looking for a good place to visit.
Contacts I am less happy about, are the ones with ‘my readers’ :P. I noticed that there are way more people reading this than I am aware of. Since you probably like to read it (otherwise you would not do it) you might understand that I like to read something of you too. Moreover, you know now, that I like to receive feedback; even when it is negative. Okay but seriously, I will not force anyone because it has to stay natural, but I do appreciate any kind of reaction on my blog :).
-
16 April 2012 - 18:22
Bernadette:
Loooooove your story and your pictures!
And you ofcourse ;)
Nice to read that you're happy and satisfied with your life and the choices you have made!
And I'm so not feeling sorry for you that you had to miss last families weekend (hehe)
You - again - are having the time of your life and that's all because of you!
(ok and a little bit because of the support from your big sister ;)
I'm still very proud of you and I'm very excited about our trip to Verona next month!!!! Yeah!!!
Big kisssss!
-
16 April 2012 - 19:01
Your Eldest Contact:
Very good again. This time even no mistake whatsoever!
No kiddin': it was great again, lovely to read!
Your dad -
16 April 2012 - 20:22
Phil:
Cutie,
Even if you went abroad many times, even if we already experienced distance, new experiences are not a piece of cake... I mean, it is never easy to handle unknown. Never easy to make new friends and to get a new lifestyle. And I'm sure that for you it becomes hard to do that over and over again.
Continue travelling/ Meeting your friends/ and seeing your boyfriend ;)
Dikke kus -
17 April 2012 - 16:23
Laura:
Hi Mellie,
Leuk om je blog weer te lezen. Ik ben één van je contacten en lezers die je wekelijks spreekt, dus met mij ben je vast erg happy ;).
Even alle gekheid op een stokje; ik vind het erg knap van je dat je zo'n goed zelfbeeld hebt, maar vooral ook dat je open staat voor feedback. Alleen dan ben je in staat om je verder te ontwikkelen. Je wordt vast een hele goede organisatie psychologe :)
Dikke kus! -
17 April 2012 - 18:21
Soledad:
My gorgeous sweet girl, I am so proud of you. Nobody is perfect. It is really hard to go abroad and far from your dear family especially from your boyfriend, Philippe. Eventhough we are far from you, you are always in our mind and in our heart. Thank you for your true and interesting story. To make friends in other country is not so easy. It takes time before you meet the good one. I read the reaction of your sweet Philippe. I was smilling when I read Dikke kus. So nice of him to say/typed that words. On April 27 you will go to Paris, you will see your boyfriend, family and friends. I know you will enjoy with them. You will feel happy to see them once again. Good luck...GOD Bless!!! Mahal kita (love you) -
17 April 2012 - 20:38
Celiiiiiiiiiiiinne:
mwawwwww your life seems cool :)
<3 -
18 April 2012 - 10:45
Raach:
Lieverd,
Moest lachen om je laatste woorden, maar ik begrijo precies wat je bedoelt: ik ben ook altijd heel nieuwsgierig naar de reacties van mijn lezers. Zo werkt het gewoon. Van mijn kant dus een reactie. Niet om je negatieve feedback te geven, nee ik meen het als ik zeg dat ik je blogs altijd met plezier lees. Ik hou ervan hoe je je gevoelens altijd zo goed weet te verwoorden. En ik hou ervan om te lezen dat je aan het genieten bent. Dat je opnieuw de juiste keuze gemaakt hebt. Ik ben trots op je! Ben blij met jou als vriendin, al is het niet meer om de hoek. Misschien komt dat ooit weer goed, je weet nooit wat voor keuzes we ooit nog maken. Dikke kus X -
20 April 2012 - 15:06
Ise:
It's really important that you like what you do (whether it is your job or what you're studying) and I'm so happy you're happy doing it! And traveling and making new friends.
Keep enjoying everything you do :)
Besos!
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